Guys/Girls, don't laugh, these were the first photos I ever posted on facebook. They were probably originally taken with one of those cameras that you have to flick your thumb until it clicks.... nevermind... if you don't know what I'm talking about I REALLY feel old.
Next Stop was high school. Most wouldn't believe me, but I think high school was the toughest for me. I didn't think that at the time, it was when I left high school and looked back and said, "What was I thinking?"
I was super eager to undo the past history I had lived through like loosing our house and my parents being separated, then reunited and all the chaos in the house during those days was, well. I was ready to leap to the next chapter.
Whatever was needed to get a scholarship, I did it. Some may look at the end of the story in High School and not beleive me when I say it was the toughest. I had received ~ 20 awards on Senior day. I had the full ride scholarship and over a 4.0 GPA. But what you may not have known:
I was sick quite alot
Most days I operated on 2-3 hours of sleep
Not much of a social life
I carried a book everywhere including those thick text books to picnics, etc
For a few weeks to a month - I literally had a nervous breakdown
I had headaches alot
I played soccer, basketball and lacrosse and marching band and I have no idea how I did it
At home, my parents had various back and knee and ankle surgeries which was more responsibility at home
Still some domestic violence and chaos in the midst of trying to stay focused on school
It was alot of responsibility, honestly, I think college was a bit easier. The awards and credits in the end of high school I don't really remember what they were. I was just happy to have a ticket to start over, a new life away in college
I am super thankful for those years. I think I was still the most organized I had ever been. I enjoyed the friends and company I had through sports and band. These arenas gave me sanity, fun and much needed breathing room. I remember the Christmas parades and football games were so much fun! Soccer definitely taught me strategy. Lacrosse taught me anyone who tries can atleast do it (did we win a game? I don't think so, but I guess I enjoyed chasing people with a stick in my hand. Disclaimer - I am not violent and I didn't hurt anyone :)
The photos above were summer in middle school and high school. I believe these definitely were the most fun I had. I got to spend a week with the soccer super stars I had watched on TV. AND they were REALLY cool loving people!
I am very thankful for my family supporting each other and the kids in doing activities that keep us focused on productive activities that have turned us into good citizens. Of course there were all the birthdays, picnics, cook outs, Maryland blue grabs, trips to North Carolina and the State fair (a story within it self). Definitely great years of my life my parents and family created.
My high school days were alot for a 15-18 year old - I wouldn't do it the way I did it. I was honestly hiding behind shame which made it so hard. Knowing what I know now, shifting my mindset would have meant everything to me back then. But experience is the best teacher and I don't have to worry about going back there mentally.
Comments